One of the questions I get most often online and in “real life” is, “How do you manage it all?” And when I stop and think about it, my life is a little crazy right now. I guess when you’re in the middle of it, you don’t realize how precarious your juggling act is. Maybe this is a survival tactic.
So here’s the God’s-honest-truth answer to that million dollar question: most of the time, I don’t.
Balls get dropped. Emails sit in my inbox and collect dust before I have a moment to wade through them. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and tip-toe into the kitchen to call my flower supplier and whisper an important forgotten order into their voicemail. I run out of underwear before I realize it’s been two weeks since I did a load of laundry. I miss networking events because all day I thought it was Tuesday, and holy #$!@ it’s Thursday. I don’t call my mom and dad enough. And that’s just the tip of the slippery iceberg, friends.
Some days, I dominate my to-do list with time and energy to spare {ahhh, those days}. Other days, I want to hide in my bed for 48 hours and pretend my looming responsibilities don’t exist. {Respect to you mommas out there who juggle work and littles; I can’t even imagine it.}
Unfortunately, you don’t get sick days when you’re the big cheese and your fate rests on your tired droopy shoulders, so I’m working on achieving more balance and organization in my day-to-day. Please note that I said working on. As in, I don’t have all the answers. But I do have a few “keep it together” practices for myself to keep me going {and I don’t even drink coffee}. Even if you’re not self-employed but feeling a little overwhelmed, try these out and see if they help!
Write it down.
Or even better, write it down twice. I pride myself on my elephant-like memory (for serious, it’s a steel trap) but even I can’t remember every little detail or customer request. I keep all of my calendars, to-do lists, and project details in a binder that goes with me just about everywhere. I love the arc customizable notebook line by Staples, because you can tailor your day planner with dozens of styles and options. I also keep pretty notebooks and colorful pens near all my workstations at home and at the shop, because — let’s be real — I’m more likely to use an organizational system if it’s cute. I also try to keep my iCalendar updated and synced with my iPhone so my schedule is always on-hand.
Eat well.
Not to be confused with it’s elitist and unachievable sister, Eat Perfectly. Go ahead, eat a cupcake and don’t beat yourself up about it, but make sure you’re fueling your body with the good stuff, too. A car can’t run on cheap gas, and you can’t run on non-fat lattes and Happy Meals. My super-healthy friend, Lisa, put this all in perspective for me one day when I was bummed about falling off my gluten-free diet wagon. She said to forget about trying to follow some unachievable diet perfectly. Just try to make more good decisions than bad, and eventually it becomes a lifestyle! I swear by green monsters and home-cooked meals. No matter how tired I am at the end of the day, I try to cook a healthy dinner every night for Chad and me.
Get a hobby.
For me, it’s this blog. Among my other favorites are photography, jewelry-making, cooking, restyling, music, and reading . The point is to have an outlet to focus on, and to flex your creative muscle. Before I started A Pretty Penny, I thought my hobby was shopping. But it was really just a time-filler and temporary band-aid that ended up getting me in a lot of financial trouble and exacerbated my stress and anxiety.
Know when to ask for back-up.
I’m a perfectionist and control freak, and I hate to ask for help. Some sick part of my brain equates reaching out for back-up with weakness, I think. So rather than teach someone else a task so I can take it off my plate, or accept a kind offer for assistance, I prefer to do it allll myself until my plate runneth over into the dark corners of oblivion. It’s not because I want all the glory or think other people are incompetent, it’s because I guess I think I can do it all and when I do it all it will be exactly the way I want it. This is stupid. And I’m working on it. Don’t be like me. Know when you’re getting a little overloaded and need someone to step in and take some of your to-do list off your hands.
Lose the guilt.
It took me a long time to learn the power of saying no. Or, in my southern-raised case: “no, thank you.” As in, “No, thank you, I can’t make it to XYZ this weekend because I’ve had a really crazy week and I just need to clean my house and take a 6-hour nap,” or “As much as I love the cause of ABC Organization, I don’t think I can commit my time on the board this year because I’m a little overextended and probably wouldn’t be much help.” Don’t feel guilty because you can’t do it all. Otherwise you’re going to find yourself stretched thinner than plastic wrap and you’re going to be worthless in just about all of it.
Follow the 80/20 rule.
I was chatting with a relative at a family get-together last night. He’s a seasoned and accomplished businessman, who’s had several successful and different ventures throughout his career. We were talking about how busy things have been at the shop, and laughing about the myth of “business ownership equals more time and freedom” {trust me ya’ll, it does not}. He told me to always remember the 80/20 rule.
Forget the illusion that you’re going to finish 100% of your to-do list every day. Just make sure you finish at least 80% before you lock it up every night. The remaining 20% can wait until tomorrow. If it’s one of those rare and luxurious days that you finish 80% early, start on the rest and see how far you get and call it a win. But as long as you’re always operating on 80/20, and getting 80% of everything done every day, you’ll make it and be successful.
Make time for fun.
It doesn’t really matter what your idea of “fun” is, just make sure you pencil in time for plenty of it. You know what they say about all work and no play.
I’d love to hear your “keep it together” practices, too! If there’s something that works for you that I haven’t mentioned here, please share it in the comments. I’m sure we’ll all appreciate any tips we can get!
What do you think?